Thursday, April 22, 2010

Same Old Feeling Chapter 31

It's kind of short and I'm not really sure that I even like it but after rewriting it three different times this is the version that I had the least amount of problems with.

I cupped his face with my hand and leaned forward and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

" I'm sorry that you felt that way. I never ment to make you feel bad." I said hoping he could hear the sincerity in my voice

" I know and I didn't tell you to try to make you feel bad either." he said as he grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze as I sat back.

" You aren't going to go all " My Bests Friends Wedding" on me are you?" I asked only half joking. He grinned at me and shook his head.

" Don't worry, I wasn't planning on it. Beside's I'm way to good looking to play Julia Robert's character anyways." he joked, seemingly back to his old self again.
" You know you are right about one thing though." I said not wanting things to get serious again but feeling like I had to let him know something. He didn't say anything as he waited for me to continue.

" I do love you in my own way. You are one of the most important people in my life and have been for a very long time and if that were to ever change I don't know what I would do."

He smiled at me again and pulled on my arm until I was practically sitting on his lap. He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me into his side. I leaned against him and put my head on his chest and let out a slow breath. I felt horrible that he had been unhappy because of me, even if I had never had a clue but there wasn't anything I could do about it now. I loved Patrick and AJ and I knew that he loved Karri or otherwise he wouldn't have even considered marriage, much less went out and bought a ring. I was content with the way that my life was turning out but there was a small part of me that couldn't help but think what if. What if he had said something years ago? Would that have changed anything or would it not have mattered? I shook my head like my thoughts could be erased like an etchasketch drawing. I turned my head as I heard some noise come from the room that AJ was in and I had to go get him before he got grumpy. I stood up and turned around to look at him one more time before I left the room.

" There isn't going to be any weirdness now is there?" I asked to make sure that there wouldn't be
" Nope no weirdness." he said agreeably

I still wasn't sure why he had decided to tell me what he did but I had a suspicion that it had to do with the alcohol and meds and I really hoped that it wouldn't get weird because I didn't want to have to deal with what might happen if it did. I handed over AJ at his request. I watched as he played with him and I wasn't surprised that it only took a few minutes for Adam to get him laughing. I got out my laptop and started to look for potential jobs and I found a few that sounded like they might fit and I made notes in a notebook so I could call later. After I was done with that I decided to check my email which was something that I wasn't great at doing on a regular basis. I emailed my mother and Olivia to let them know how things were going and I emailed them some newer pictures that had been taken of the three of us. We didn't do much talking for the rest of the night and finally after eating supper and putting the baby down I told him that I was really tired and went to lie down upstairs in one of the guest rooms.

1 comment:

  1. I think this chapter turned out well. I hope things aren't weird, but I still kind of wish that AJ was their child...